Margaret Charles Margaret Charles

A New Year

As we enter the new year a recurring thought has come to mind. Why do people constantly allow others to validate them? After doing a bit of research I found that this question is often related to self-esteem issues. When one becomes an adult I was under the impression that they shouldn’t be accountable to any being other than a higher power or someone they are committed to. However, more than ever it appears a great number of the population seem to live their lives concerned about what “others” think of them. So after doing some research I’ve found the common thread between the above mentioned tends to be The Abilene Paradox. An example of this theory is a situation where the collective in a group agrees on a path of action that none of the individual members want to do (Flores, 2023). Experts have claimed this happens when individuals blindly follow social expectations in order to fit in. As a result, these individuals are detrimentally falling short of advocating for themselves.

Reasons why people fall into this category include: wanting to appear nice or non-confrontational. Therefore they compromise their integrity in order to “get along” or “avoid conflict.” Consequences of living this way are living with internal turmoil and often causes the persons to inherit a passive aggressive personality. This occurs because they feel it is the only way to assert themselves. In order to avoid falling into the Abilene Paradox one must learn to become a self-advocate. This is a person who is aware of their rights and knows how and when to exert them without infringing on the rights of others to do the same. Finally, once you learn to self-advocate you will be able to boldly say no when you are not interested and in return you will not compromise your rights or authority.

References:

Flores, et;al, (March 23, 2023) The Abiliene Paradox: The Curse of Caring Too Much Available at SSRN:https://ssrn.com/abstract=4406948

Emory University, (August, 2022) Self Advocacy and resiliency: Essential Traits for Women in Leadership Roles https://ece.emory.edu/articles-news/foundational-skills-for-women-in-leadership.php

As we enter the new year a recurring thought has come to mind. Why do people constantly allow others to validate them? After doing a bit of research I found that this question is often related to self-esteem issues. When one becomes an adult I was under the impression that they shouldn’t be accountable to any being other than a higher power or someone they are committed to. However, more than ever it appears a great number of the population seem to live their lives concerned about what “others” think of them. So after doing some research I’ve found the common thread between the above mentioned tends to be The Abilene Paradox. An example of this theory is a situation where the collective in a group agrees on a path of action that none of the individual members want to do (Flores, 2023). Experts have claimed this happens when individuals blindly follow social expectations in order to fit in. As a result, these individuals are detrimentally falling short of advocating for themselves.

Reasons why people fall into this category include: wanting to appear nice or non-confrontational. Therefore they compromise their integrity in order to “get along” or “avoid conflict.” Consequences of living this way are living with internal turmoil and often causes the persons to inherit a passive aggressive personality. This occurs because they feel it is the only way to assert themselves. In order to avoid falling into the Abilene Paradox one must learn to become a self-advocate. This is a person who is aware of their rights and knows how and when to exert them without infringing on the rights of others to do the same. Finally, once you learn to self-advocate you will be able to boldly say no when you are not interested and in return you will not compromise your rights or authority.

References:

Flores, et;al, (March 23, 2023) The Abiliene Paradox: The Curse of Caring Too Much Available at SSRN:https://ssrn.com/abstract=4406948

Emory University, (August, 2022) Self Advocacy and resiliency: Essential Traits for Women in Leadership Roles https://ece.emory.edu/articles-news/foundational-skills-for-women-in-leadership.php

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Margaret Charles Margaret Charles

Blog Post Title Two

It all begins with an idea.

It all begins with an idea. Maybe you want to launch a business. Maybe you want to turn a hobby into something more. Or maybe you have a creative project to share with the world. Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.

Don’t worry about sounding professional. Sound like you. There are over 1.5 billion websites out there, but your story is what’s going to separate this one from the rest. If you read the words back and don’t hear your own voice in your head, that’s a good sign you still have more work to do.

Be clear, be confident and don’t overthink it. The beauty of your story is that it’s going to continue to evolve and your site can evolve with it. Your goal should be to make it feel right for right now. Later will take care of itself. It always does.

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Margaret Charles Margaret Charles

Blog Post Title Three

It all begins with an idea.

It all begins with an idea. Maybe you want to launch a business. Maybe you want to turn a hobby into something more. Or maybe you have a creative project to share with the world. Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.

Don’t worry about sounding professional. Sound like you. There are over 1.5 billion websites out there, but your story is what’s going to separate this one from the rest. If you read the words back and don’t hear your own voice in your head, that’s a good sign you still have more work to do.

Be clear, be confident and don’t overthink it. The beauty of your story is that it’s going to continue to evolve and your site can evolve with it. Your goal should be to make it feel right for right now. Later will take care of itself. It always does.

Read More
Margaret Charles Margaret Charles

Blog Post Title Four

It all begins with an idea.

It all begins with an idea. Maybe you want to launch a business. Maybe you want to turn a hobby into something more. Or maybe you have a creative project to share with the world. Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.

Don’t worry about sounding professional. Sound like you. There are over 1.5 billion websites out there, but your story is what’s going to separate this one from the rest. If you read the words back and don’t hear your own voice in your head, that’s a good sign you still have more work to do.

Be clear, be confident and don’t overthink it. The beauty of your story is that it’s going to continue to evolve and your site can evolve with it. Your goal should be to make it feel right for right now. Later will take care of itself. It always does.

Read More